Good days, Bad days

Mon. 5/17 cardio. Did it. Didn't break any time. Very sore at work. People ask why I a walking so funny, I say I went to the gym this morning.

Tues. 5/18 Lower body Doing better at squats and lunges, but they are friggin hard. Hurt my right foot doing lifts... Foot bothered me all day. Think PMS is settin in...I can feel it. Not myself.

Wed 5/19 Cardio. Sucked completely, couldn't run, did slow cardio, but finished, disappointed in myself, wanted to break my time, knew when I walked out the door I was going to..got on the treadmill and in first round of running, I couldn't do it....ask me WHY..couldn't tell you. Was it the bad dream I woke from, is it PMS beginning, was it the pain in my upper left leg and my right foot....maybe just a bad day. I don't know my body well enough to know if I was giving up and not running thru the pain or I was listening to my body with it telling me to take it easy. I have No idea.

GREAT week

Thurs 5/13 Lower body. Getting better at squats and lunges....painful but I am doing it! Really cut back on food intake with quantities and what I was eating, switching things around a bit. Less fruis for my carbs and more veggies.

Fri 5/14 Cardio. Kristin couldn't make it, so I had Jeff, another trainer, he was good, put the fans on, which really helped in my body temp. Should have pushed it to break my time, I regret it now.

Sat 5/15 Upper body Weigh in Day. Had another trainer today, I think her name was Jen, showed me lots of stretches. I knew I was going to have a good weigh in, I knew I ate better and less.....5 pounds I lost...but I also lost muscle which is not good, so I have to add more protein?, more food, I will talk to Kristin on Monday...but I am very very happy!

Transforming even after 5 weeks

After only 5 weeks...I was pretty impressed

Mon 5/10 Cardio. I new something was wrong when I got up...not to be graphic...I ate alittle of the WRONG foods on mother's day....indulged alittle with bernaise sauce and potato casserole....even though it wasn't a ot, my body hasnt had dairy, butter, since i started...needless to say I was in the bathroom when I got up and had to get off the treadmil halfway thru, then ack on. Couldn't break any times but it happens...live and learn. Kristin was fine and understood. Sore still after...but slowly got better at work....aiming to do extr good with small portions this week. Suffered all day from Mothers day meal. Mother's Day itself was great, we had a real realxing time.

Tues 5/11 Upper body. Arms did good, can't realy talk to Kristin when I do cardio, but arms we can chat alittle. It was good. I am getting stronger! Feel good!

Wed 2/12 Cardio. I was ready, my knees felt ok. It's still so hard but I was determined as much as Kristin to change the number on the board from 1.14 to at least 1.15 and I did, in the last 2 seconds it changed to 1.15....thank God, I would have been pissed with myself if I couldn't push it just alittle more.

Finishing my of week 5

I didn't write mid week due to me responding to a comment posted. I hope that answered their question, I think it did as the person reveled themselves to me finally. ;)

Mon. 5/3 Cardio. Hit the 1.11 mark again in Cardio.. Wish I broke the time. Knees killing, lots of ice.

Tues 5/4 Lower body. Pulled a muscle in back of thigh, very painful, did the best i could

Suffering from unknown anxiety about the gym.

Wed 5/5 Cardio...hit 1.14 Yeah!!!!!! hard but did it...again kness killing, lots of ice.

Had heart to heart with someone who knows me real well, speaking about my fears at the gym, and it a combination of fear of failing, hurting myself, disappointing Kristin, and talking made me feel much better

Thurs 5/6 Upper body did good, increasing the weights. still sore from lower body in the thighs. Hope its better by Satuday.

Friday 5/7 cardio Hit 1.14 again....happy:) Knees real bad.....icing...still sore from lower body in the thighs

Sat. 5/8 Lower Body. weigh in day...lost only 1.5 pounds but looking back at body fat I started with 141 pounds of bady fat and now I am down to 127 pounds of body fat and up in my lean body mass...so that sounds better to me that just saying I lost just 1.5 pounds. Another guy was there today who I have seen many times working with Bill, who has lost over 100 pounds with them over the course of a year. Amazing. He brought in his old pants and Bill took a picture.

I did much better today with lower body, I went in with a different mind set and it seem to help me perform better. Now I look forward the rest of the day and tomorrow off. Sleepin in, Plus its Mothers Day!

Responding to comment

Anonymous said...

I have read each one of your postings which describes your day. I have yet to come to the understanding as to WHY you made the decision to lose weight in the first place. I'm trying to lose weight myself but keep failing, I just want to give up, how do you do it?

Answer: i wanted my old life back....from over 14 yrs ago but even better.

It was never a matter of why i wanted to lose weight...I never wanted to gain in the first place. I used to be thin...thin with never exercising....over 14 yrs ago....a marriage, becoming an instant mom of 3 young children, marrying for the wrong reasons, dealing with drug addiction in the home, a divorce, custody battle.....all at the same time making sure my kids were as unaffected as possible, made it very difficult for me to balance taking care of myself and the kids. The kids were #1, and I let myself go, food was comfort. Kids turned out awesome, and I kept getting bigger and bigger, averaging 10 pounds a year. Tried diet after diet, but it wasn't until I went to the doctor and realized I gained 40 pounds since my last visit 4 years prior, it was a wake up call. I FINALLY was ready. I needed to get real with my weight, see what I really looked liked, realized where i will be by the time I am 50 and needed to do something. Friends helped me make a video to apply to the Biggest Loser with the promise if i didn't get on the show (1 in a 300,000 chance) I needed plan B. After doing research on weight loss programs I found personal training in a personal training facility....where I don't have to be self conscious in a public gym..which I wouldn't go into. Found one 3 minutes from my house. They promote a 12 week transformation program...5 or 6 days a week. It cost a lot of money but I knew it would, as it is 1 on 1 training is expensive and I have to say worth every penny. I just had no idea how hard it would be to do all the work, but even though I suffer in pain, bitch about it, the program is working....I know it will take a lot longer than 12 weeks...more like 60 weeks, but eve after 12 weeks, I will be transformed into a new person. A person who has lost weight, gained muscle, and shrunk many many inches. If you follow their program, push yourself, eat what they tell you it works....I am proof. So that is why. I wanted get control of my life, and get healthy for the next journey in my life as my kids grow and have their own life. I had no idea how hard it would be, and I still have doubt, I have many fears, I have pain, but I keep going, my faith and commitment to this program keeps me getting up everyday at 4:30 am. It isn't an option in my head not to finish or not get up and in the gym. Hope that answers your question.

Trying new things

Thurs 4/29 Lower Body...Holy Sh**! is all I can say right now. I am writing this live as I am still trying to catch my breath, my legs are shaking and I am still sweating from the NEW lower body workout Kristin is having me start..from lunges to squats to using the sit up machine...everyone who I have seen doing any of these...it didn't look very hard...but a totally different story when I am trying to do it. Boy and I was just scratching the surface of how those others were doing it. I had no weights on the machines while doing it. Not what I expected this morning...but my sneakers worked out great!

Fri 4/30 Cardio. From my ASS to my ankles are so sore from all those new exercises from yesterday! My thighs from squats were making it sooo difficult to get out of bed. And this morning Cardio!!!!!! I was happy I had my new sneakers for cardio.....thinking it would make cardio just a little easier....it didn't...it was still as hard and I still kept my distance of 1.11. Came home still having to ice the knees. Between my thighs and my knees I can only imagine what I looked like walking upstairs to take my shower. Needless to say it took me awhile to get up there. Hoping the pain will get better as the day goes by. Looking forward to beautiful weekend weather. Pain ALL day & night from those squats and lunges!!!!!!

Sat 5/1 Upper body. Weigh in day. Solid 3 pounds lost Still aching from lower body on Thurs. I drag my body out of bed for upper body and weigh in. I wanted 4 pounds, got 3, I am ok with that. Its consistently going down, think close to 15 pounds now. Gaining lean body mass and losing fat....Kristen looks more at that than I do. Upper body was tough, maybe because my whole lower body still hurts so much....hope this all doesn't sound whiny, but I never did a lunge or a squat EVER in my life, never mind some some sets of them. And everyone says they will get easier and I will be able to do more as I keep doing them. So now I am going to enjoy my Saturday, and Sunday of rest and sun and some fun! Have to buy some healthy food to bring today for a gathering with friends.

Figuring It Out

I am typing all this trying to get used to my new progressive glasses...sucks getting old. Is not that easy. Lauren said she likes my other glasses better. We'll she what others say.

Mon 4/26 Cardio. Tired this morning. I knew Kristin was going to make me at least stay at 1.09. It was hard...We stayed at 1.09. Came home and put ice on my knees...She said my knee problems could be due to my sneakers....I don't have good knees to begin with....I am hoping its the sneakers rather than an old injury flaring up, cause that would mean it would only get worse. As the day progressed my knees did not get better. Not good.

Tue. 4/27 Upper arms. Wow arms are totally getting harder.....and heavier, and its arms for a whole hour, but I am impressed what I can even do. My left arm is weaker than my right. I wonder if it will balance out. I probably have more strength than I ever have in my life.

My knee was bad all day at work. My co-worker Danielle (a runner) also said it could be my sneakers, said I should go the this special store where they really measure your foot, fit you perfectly, put me on a treadmill and video tape me running to see, if my form is correct in the shoes....I wanted to go Tuesday, had to teach. After work Jeff made me an awesome baked chicken dinner with grilled asparagus and squash. Its so nice he takes care of me on Tues and Thurs, before I teach...semester almost over.

Wed.4/28 Cardio. My knees felt a little better when I first got up, took 2 aleve to get thru cardio. I could tell Kristin was kickin it up alittle...I asked 3/4 thru if we were ahead, to see if we were going to break the 1.09....and we sure did. 1.11...yeah. Can home in pain...iced the knees, I was really looking forward to going to the store Fleet Feet in West Hartford at lunch with Danielle. The store was awesome. Never had such good customer service for buying a pair of sneakers. The guy was great....did a lot of explaining. It was quite the education. I was fitted and then got on the treadmill and my feet were video taped...then I watched it in slow motion. I had good form with my toe and heel action, so I was good to go. I wore them out of the store, and instantly felt relief with my knees and walking. The other sneakers really were worn. So glad I went and so excited with my new sneakers! Actually looking forward to trying them out on Friday with Cardio and hope it clears up my knee problems...quick!